NFL Picks--Wildcard Weekend

Last week: 13-3
Season record: 163-81

Wow....that season flew by and now it's Wild Card Weekend.  And unlike other seasons, there are some extremely interesting matchups--like, every game is interesting.  So let's have at it...

Kansas City at Indianapolis--If you are a Chiefs' fan, you can't possibly feel confident heading into January.  Your team finished 2-14 last year, and started 2013 by winning nine straight, only to lose five out of seven.  Those five losses included two defeats at the hands of top seed Denver and one to this same Indianapolis squad last week.  Of course, even while resting key starters yesterday, the Chiefs almost upset the now-playoff-bound Chargers.  The Colts clinched their division weeks ago but they have been rounding into playoff form of late.  And who wouldn't want to see the Colts play Denver in the divisional round?  But you know what?  I have a feeling the Chiefs will find a way.  Chiefs 26, Colts 24

New Orleans at Philadelphia--The Eagles won the NFC East in the 11th hour, and their "reward" is facing the explosive Saints.  Luckily for Philly, this contest is at home, where it won't be climate controlled the way Drew Brees and his team likes it.  But if the Saints have Super Bowl aspirations, they had better use this as a test to see if they can handle Old Man Winter in the Northeast.  Eagles 30, Saints 27

San Diego at Cincinnati--If not for Ryan Succop missing that field goal at the end of regulation in San Diego, the Steelers would be facing their division rival here instead of the Chargers.  Thankfully we're spared a third straight Houston vs. Cincinnati wild card game, even though this is the least intriguing game of the weekend.  Bengals 24, Chargers 14

San Francisco at Green Bay--How much magic does Aaron Rodgers have left?  And can the Niners take their red hot show on the road to frigid Lambeau Field and escape with a win?  Sure, San Fran has had their way with the Pack lately, but there is no way Rodgers' feel good story doesn't continue.
Packers 38, Niners 35

NFL Picks: Week 17

Last week: 10-6
Season record: 150-78

Well, here we are.  The final countdown of the 2013 season, and it reeks of sadness.  But wait, it also reeks of excitement, because while we've had a pretty awesome NFL December, Week 17 features something like thirteen games out of sixteen with playoff implications.  That just doesn't happen every day.  And for all the crap we've flung like monkeys on laxatives at Roger Goodell, pitting division rivals against each other to decide divisions in Week 17?  Brilliant.  Which is why the NFC East and North features two incredible games that are essentially playoff games--no matter how bad those divisions have been.  Okay, with that, let's pick 'em!

NY Jets at Miami--Rex Ryan said publicly he knows he's getting canned.  Which makes it hilarious that he has his team playing hard and vying for a .500 record, almost to piss off his bosses and make them look bad when they hand him that pink slip.  Right after he muddies the AFC playoff picture some more by beating the Dolphins.  Jets 16, Dolphins 13

Houston at Tennessee--Ah, one of the three games that means squat.  Let's see if we can figure out the other two.  Meanwhile, how bad did Houston tank its season?  Starting out 2-0 and then losing 13 straight?  When they were a legit Super Bowl contender?  I just don't get it.  Titans 23, Texans 13

Carolina at Atlanta--The Falcons are right there with the Texans as almighty tankers, when last season they were the 1-seed and came damn close to the Super Bowl.  And here they are in a spoiler role, and I have this weird feeling they will indeed spoil the Panthers' division title aspirations.  Falcons 21, Panthers 18

Cleveland at Pittsburgh--Pittsburgh began the season 0-4 and here they sit with an outside shot at the postseason, on the sideline trying to trip up the Dolphins, Chargers and Ravens.  Steelers 24, Browns 16

Washington at NY Giants--Does anyone else think that Kirk Cousins could someday be on par with Brady, Brees and Rodgers?  And RG3 could someday be on par with Rex Grossman?  Oh and if you're keeping score at home, this is matchup #2 that means nothing.  Redskins 38, Giants 24

Jacksonville at Indianapolis--Any game featuring the Jags makes me sleepy.  Colts 28, Jags 13

Detroit at Minnesota--#3!  Jim Schwartz could be the first coach fired, so in reality there is some intrigue to this game.  Vikings 30, Lions 27

Baltimore at Cincinnati--The Bengals have already clinched the division but they want to start their postseason with momentum and get a decent seed.  The Ravens have a shot at a wild card after winning it all last season, but Cincy is 7-0 at home.  Bengals 20, Ravens 16

San Francisco at Arizona--You wanna feel bad for a team?  Arizona could be 11-5 and miss the playoffs.  That's how much more superior the NFC is over the AFC and the NFC West is over everyone else.  Didn't see that coming.  Cards 23, Niners 20

Kansas City at San Diego--The Chiefs were 2-14 last season, but began this year 9-0 with new coach Andy Reid at the helm.  The Chargers were dead in the water a few weeks ago, but here they are on the verge of grabbing the 6-seed.  Chargers 38, Chiefs 31

St. Louis at Seattle--If the Seahawks lose back to back home games to close out the season, then I really have no idea how the playoffs shake out.  I may not have an idea anyway, but still.  And no, I don't think it will happen.  Side note:  how good are the defenses in that division?  Yikes.  Seahawks 20, Rams 10

Buffalo at New England--Buffalo will go up 17-0 early in the second quarter.  The Pats will cut it to 17-7 right before halftime.  The Pats will win 35-17.  Isn't that how every Bills/Pats game goes?  Patriots 35, Bills 17

Green Bay at Chicago--Aaron Rodgers comes back just in time to save the Packers' season, against the team he got hurt against.  Trestman has to deal with the Cutler/McCown questions until September or longer.   Packers 34, Bears 30

Denver at Oakland--Part of me wants to pick Oakland, because they have shown flashes of being decent this year.  But part of me is much smarter than that.  Broncos 38, Raiders 17

Tampa Bay at New Orleans--Who gets fired first, Schiano or Schwartz?  Or Ryan?  Or Shanny?  Black Monday will not be a slow news day.  Saints 29, Bucs 16

Philadelphia at Dallas--The last game of the 2013 regular season is for the NFC East division.  But Kyle Orton vs. Nick Foles?  Tell me you saw that coming.  Eagles 40, Cowboys 28

NFL Picks: Week 16

Last week: 9-7
Season record: 140-72

Damn, how the hell did it get to be Week 16 in the blink of an eye?  Yet here we are, talking playoff scenarios and draft pick order.  I'm a Giants fan, so I had to throw in that last part.  I mean, what else do we have when we've had an abysmal season?  Oh yeah, we had the Packers with that epic comeback against the Cowboys, with Romo throwing a critical interception or two late in the game.  It's also looking like snow in a few places again, maybe making for some awesome slipping and sliding like two weeks ago.  Okay, with that, here are the picks....

Miami at Buffalo--The Dolphins truly have something to play for, but I'm sorry, I don't think they can win in Buffalo in December no matter what the records of the two teams are.  Bills 20, Dolphins 16

New Orleans at Carolina--It's safe to say that this game is for maybe not all the marbles, but for a large handful of marbles.  Panthers 23, Saints 20

Dallas at Washington--If you are a Dallas fan, you have every right to be afraid of Kirk Cousins.  I mean, the Giants have Curtis Painter behind Eli Manning.  I'm extremely jealous.  Redskins 34, Cowboys 31

Tampa Bay at St. Louis--Greg Schiano against Jeff Fisher.  I put the over/under of player and/or coach ejections at 6.  And the times the word "chippy" will be uttered by the announcers has an over/under of 27.  We're talking chippy and chippier here.  Rams 20, Bucs 14

Cleveland at NY Jets--The Jets are a remarkable 5-2 at home and the Browns are 1-5 away.  I know this season is upside down but sometimes you gotta play the numbers.  Jets 23, Browns 17

Indianapolis at Kansas City--This actually may be one of the better games Sunday.  Will Jamaal Charles top last week's epic fantasy performance?  Probably not, but he will carry some teams to a fantasy title.  Chiefs 35, Colts 27

Minnesota at Cincinnati--Yeah, so the Vikings are 0-6 on the road and the Bengals are 6-0 at home.  A monkey can pick this one.  Bengals 27, Vikings 10

Denver at Houston--The Texans have not won a game since mid-September.  How does a team on the verge of greatness fall so far in one season?  Broncos 42, Texans 17

Tennessee at Jacksonville--Wake me up when it's over.  Titans 22, Jags 20

Arizona at Seattle--Cards fans, you can't be happy with the schedule makers.  You are on the verge of grabbing a wild card spot while playing in an incredibly tough division, and you have to go to Seattle in Week 16 and host the Niners in Week 17.  The football gods toy with you, and then they kick you in the nuts.  Seahawks 31, Cards 13

NY Giants at Detroit--Don't be surprised if this one is more competitive than you think, because the Giants have this way of mystifying we fans.  Then again, the snakes have bit them so much this year that you have to believe it'll continue.  Lions 35, Giants 17

New England at Baltimore--The Pats struggle just a bit on the road, as they have a 3-4 record away from Foxboro.  The Ravens are 6-1 in Baltimore.  Yes it's wacky 2013, but numbers have a way of telling the truth much of the time.  And Joe Flacco might just be leading his team to a division title or at least a wild card spot.  Oh lord, please don't subject us to another Harbaugh Bowl.  Ravens 30, Patriots 27

Pittsburgh at Green Bay--Get ready for an old fashioned snow bowl between two of the league's most storied franchises--with both having storybook mediocre seasons.  Packers 19, Steelers 16

Oakland at San Diego--The over/under for Andrew Siciliano saying "SON-Diego" is four.  I love Red Zone and dude is really good at his job, but sometimes he tries too hard to be funny or dramatic.  Chargers 31, Raiders 23

Chicago at Philadelphia--The flexing NBC crew picked a beauty for the Sunday night game.  Now I wish we could flex out of Carrie Underwood and Al Michaels, as well as that stupid way they introduce the starting lineups.  "Mikey's Crystal Ball, THE U".  Eagles 31, Bears 24

Atlanta at San Francisco--And then you have Mike Tirico and Jon Gruden with major flex envy, as they get to call a 4-10 team visiting a 10-4 playoff bound team.  Niners 38, Falcons 17

  

NFL Picks: Week 15

Last week: 15-1
Last night: 0-1
Season record: 131-66

Wow.  Did anyone see that coming last night?  Way to shake up the playoff race, Chargers and Broncos.  But really, in 2013, it seems like anything is possible.  Upside down is right side up and the NFC East, NFC North and AFC North are all extremely mediocre.  So after going 15-1 last week it would figure that on Thursday Night Football, I match last week's loss total.  So let's try and match the win total of last week now.  Here we go....

New England at Miami--Truth be told, the Patriots are 7-0 at home and just 3-3 on the road, but now that they have the #1 seed in their sights, don't think the Hoodie and the Brady won't will their way to wins like they did against the Browns last week.  Patriots 31, Dolphins 24

Buffalo at Jacksonville--This is the kind of game the Jags are ripe to lose now that they have a few wins, including three straight.  But I think the Bills are slowly unraveling.  Jags 23, Bills 20

Houston at Indianapolis--The mighty have fallen through the floor and through the basement and halfway to China.  Colts 27, Texans 10

Philadelphia at Minnesota--Of course this one also reeks of upset, considering how the Vikes played the last few weeks--tying Green Bay on the road, taking the Bears deep into OT before winning, and then playing one of the most entertaining games ever at Baltimore but barely losing by 3.  The Eagles are rolling but they are due to stumble.  Or not.  Eagles 28, Vikings 25

Seattle at NY Giants--My Giants are a complete and utter mess.  And there is just no way I can see them beating a Super Bowl caliber team right now.  Seahawks 34, Giants 10

San Francisco at Tampa Bay--Get ready for Schiano to pull out his bag of tricks like he did against Seattle.  Then get ready for the Niners to not fall for any of it.  Niners 26, Bucs 17

Chicago at Cleveland--In all honestly, just flip a coin.  These two teams are just near impossible to predict from week to week.  Browns 20, Bears 16

Washington at Atlanta--It sure is getting ugly in DC, isn't it?  And I'm not talking about Congress.  I really feel bad for Shanahan, who is maybe the lamest of ducks right now.  Falcons 27, Redskins 17

NY Jets at Carolina--Uh oh.  The Panthers are back home and pissed about that ass-whooping in the Superdome. Poor Rex.  Poor Geno (or Simms or whatever butt fumbler is under center).  Panthers 20, Jets 6

Kansas City at Oakland--I so wanna pick the Raiders.  But the Chiefs need this game even more now that the Broncos lost last night.  And I don't think they blow it.  Chiefs 27, Raiders 20

Arizona at Tennessee--The Cards do not suck anymore, begging the question of whether or not Bruce Arians, who also coached the Colts into the playoffs last year while Chuck Pagano was recovering from cancer treatments, is one of the greatest coaching stories in the NFL right now.  Cards 19, Titans 17

Green Bay at Dallas--It's amazing to think, but I would have picked the Pack if Rodgers was back at QB.  He's not, so I won't.  Cowboys 34, Packers 27

New Orleans at St. Louis--I was all excited that there were five games in the late afternoon time slot, but then had my balloon burst when I saw which five games they were.  Yawn. And don't be surprised if the Saints have a letdown after last week's huge win against Carolina.  Rams 23, Saints 20

Cincinnati at Pittsburgh--Don't look at the records.  As long as Mike Tomlin doesn't trip anyone on the sidelines, he'll figure out a way to beat his division leading division rivals on Sunday night.  Steelers 16, Bengals 13

Baltimore at Detroit--Two 7-6 teams fighting for a shot at the postseason.  But facts are facts, and the Ravens are dreadful (1-5) away from home.  Lions 30, Ravens 27




  

NFL Thursday Night Football Week 15 pick

Last week: 15-1
Season record: 131-65

Yeah, that's right.  In a wacky season, I went 15-1 last weekend.  I can't explain why or how, but I'm sure at least some of it was dumb luck.  Or maybe I just know what I'm doing more than I thought I did.  Hopefully I won't make too much of a splat when coming back down to earth in Week 15! 

San Diego at Denver--I think it's safe to say it will be cold in Denver tonight, and it's hard to imagine the warm weather Chargers coming in to Mile High (or whatever that stadium is called now) and stopping that offensive juggernaut.  Of course, you might say Peyton Manning has cold weather issues as well, but the bottom line is that Denver is home, they are too good, and they will roll over the Lightning Bolts.  Broncos 41, Chargers 28

NFL Picks: Week 14

Last night: 1-0
Season record: 117-64

No more bye weeks!  That means 14 games on Sunday.  What could be better? 

Oakland at NY Jets--While the Raiders have been inconsistent this year, they still can't compare to the Jekyll & Hyde routine of the Jets.  Holy crap.  In a 15 day span recently, the Jets beat the Patriots and Saints, sandwiched around a 49-9 ass whooping at the hands of the Bengals.  Before that stretch, they gave the Steelers their first win.  Then these last few weeks they lost by a combined 79-20 to the Bills, Ravens and Dolphins.  So to follow this logically.....Jets 23, Raiders 17

Indianapolis at Cincinnati--I get the impression the Bengals aren't getting the respect they deserve.  Bengals 20, Colts 16

Detroit at Philadelphia--I hate the Eagles, so what I'm about to say is hypothetical.  If I rooted for that team, I'd be pissed that they are able to suddenly look like a playoff team when they were just mailing it in for the first half of the season.  Eagles 34, Lions 31

Miami at Pittsburgh--Mike Wallace returns to Pittsburgh, but, honestly, does anyone care?  Steelers 12, Dolphins 10

Cleveland at New England--The Hoodie and The Brady smell blood, everyone.  Lock up your Browns.  Patriots 28, Browns 13

Kansas City at Washington--At some point the Chiefs need to win another game if we're to take them seriously.  Chiefs 24, Redskins 21

Minnesota at Baltimore--Wouldn't it be fun to have both purple teams wear their home uniforms?  Maybe then whichever Minnesota QB plays would throw to the correct team.  Ravens 27, Vikings 17

Atlanta at Green Bay--This was the Sunday night game but got flexed out.  How the mighty have fallen.  Packers 23, Falcons 20

Buffalo at Tampa Bay--Do you think the guys who have to call this game for CBS saw who they were working and went, "Come on, MAN?"  I know I would.  Bucs 31, Bills 27

Tennessee at Denver--While Eli's Giants suck in the red zone, Peyton's Broncos (and before that, his Colts) suck in the big game zone.  Please remember you read that here.  Oh, it's common knowledge?  Oh, okay.  Broncos 29, Titans 16

St. Louis at Arizona--Blech.  Cards 16, Rams 14

NY Giants at San Diego--I feel like when these teams meet every four years, Philip Rivers has to try and prove to the Giants that the 2004 draft day trade was a mistake.  Chargers 31, Giants 27

Seattle at San Francisco--Don't think the Niners don't remember that 29-3 Week 2 drubbing in Seattle.  Niners 20, Seahawks 17

Carolina at New Orleans--This game and the rematch in two weeks will likely determine who wins the NFC South.  Al Michaels and Cris Collinsworth were practically salivating over the fact that they dodged the Bills/Bucs game for this one.  Saints 28, Panthers 21

Dallas at Chicago--Follow the bouncing ball as it gets stuck in the crappy Soldier Field turf.  Bears 24, Cowboys 23

NFL Thursday Night Pick: Week 14

Last week: 3-0
Season record: 116-64

So last week the Thanksgiving holiday took its toll on my routine, so to speak.  Maybe it was too much turkey, maybe it was the fact that I took last Friday off, maybe it was the fact that the games were so hard to pick that I just bowed out subconsciously.  Okay, I just forgot!  So there were no picks last week beyond Thanksgiving day.  I could tell you how I thought the games would play out.  I could just give myself losses on all of the Sunday and Monday games.  But since this is my own blog that I do just for fun, I'll just not count those games in my standings.  And so, with that, here is my pick for tonight's game:

Houston at Jacksonville--I don't know what happened to the Texans, but holy crap, ten straight losses?  These guys were almost in the Super Bowl last season.  I don't know what happened to the Jags, but holy crap, three out of four wins after starting the season 0-8?  Still, I give to you, the Toilet Bowl.  Jags 27, Texans 24

NFL Thanksgiving Day picks

Last week: 7-7
Season record: 113-64

The season just keeps getting more interesting, as the crappy NFC East and North divisions seem prepared to each produce an 8-8 division winner, which will each host wild card games against far superior teams.  The AFC has something like ten 5-6 teams.  Okay there is no excuse not to look that up so I just did--there are six teams at 5-6--NY Jets, Miami, Baltimore, Pittsburgh, Tennessee and San Diego.  Cleveland, Oakland and Buffalo are all 4-7 and not out of it by any means.  Meanwhile, in the NFC the Giants at 4-7 are all but mathematically eliminated and will be when they lose to the Skins on Sunday night.  I'm a Giants fan, I can say that with confidence.  Meanwhile, let's turn the page to Turkey Day's slate of games......

Green Bay at Detroit--So let me get this straight.  The 5-5-1 Packers can take over sole possession of first place if they beat Detroit and the Bears lose to the Vikings?  Even if that doesn't happen, Aaron Rodgers will be back for the next game, and that can't bode well for Detroit and Chicago.  Lions 38, Packers 34

Oakland at Dallas--On the surface you may look at this game as being a potential blowout in favor of the home team.  But trust me, this Raiders' team is pesky and Dallas can overlook them at their own risk.  But I don't think they will.  Cowboys 27, Raiders 17

Pittsburgh at Baltimore--Just a few weeks ago the prospect of this storied rivalry match up on Thanksgiving night threatened to be a meaningless game.  But lookie here--the Steelers have won five of six and are sitting at 5-6 after starting out 0-5.  And they are both in that mix of 5-6 teams on the cusp of a wild card spot.  It's probably even fathomable at this point that they both make it.  Let the mouth-smashing commence.  Ravens 20, Steelers 17

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

NFL Week 12 picks

Last week: 10-5
Last night: 1-0
Season record: 107-57

Weirdness continues to rule the NFL, so I actually feel pretty good about my picks record this season.  Of course, that doesn't mean you should take my predictions beyond face value, because undoubtedly, that will be the week I go 3-11.  So anyway, let's have some fun....

Carolina at Miami--So it's come to this.  The Panthers beat the Niners on the road and the Patriots at home, and need to win to stay one game back of the Saints in the NFC South.  Of course, a wild card is all but guaranteed.  And I don't think Miami has what it takes to beat these guys.  Panthers 20, Dolphins 14

Chicago at St. Louis--On paper, the Bears should win this fairly easily. But this is not paper, and I just don't trust the Bears with or without Cutler at this point in any season.  Rams 23, Bears 20

NY Jets at Baltimore--Is it the Jets that only win in even numbered weeks or something stupid like that?  That's what I call a BS statistic that is based only in luck.  Of course, the Jets also may be wildly inconsistent.  But if that's a streak, it ends Sunday.  Ravens 17, Jets 14

Jacksonville at Houston--Do you think Andre Johnson has no use for Matt Schaub?  Hey, it's not like Schaub was the idiot who put himself into the game, right?  But Johnson couldn't be angry at his coach who had a stroke a couple weeks earlier.  Texans 27, Jags 17

Minnesota at Green Bay--All told, Scott Tolzien looked good when he wasn't throwing balls to the Giants.  So he should be able to handle the Vikings, right?  There is of course that Peterson dude to worry about.  Packers 28, Vikings 24

Pittsburgh at Cleveland--What a mess the AFC North is.  The Bengals sit up top at 7-4 and all three other teams, including these two, are 4-6.  The Steelers, however, have won four of five.  But this Browns team is not folding like a tent like in years past.  Browns 20, Steelers 17

Tampa Bay at Detroit--The Bucs have really won two in a row?  Well yeah, but both of those games were at home, and the Lions need this one too badly to blow it.  Right?  Lions 35, Bucs 20

San Diego at Kansas City--The Chiefs finally lost last week in Denver.  And now they get another tough division rival.  Chiefs 19, Chargers 16

Tennessee at Oakland--Seriously Goodell, how many teams are 4-6??  Raiders 24, Titans 21

Indianapolis at Arizona--This game is oddly significant because Bruce Arians gets to coach against the team he coached in Chuck Pagano's absence last season.  That's got to feel pretty weird, and it should also give Arians' Cards a unique edge.  Plus, they are playing way good right now.  Cards 20, Colts 16

Dallas at NY Giants--I sure loved the fact that my Giants did not have the Joe Buck/Troy Aikman tandem all year, but I have no doubt that streak will end Sunday.  Hopefully the G-men's winning streak will not end with it.  Giants 38, Cowboys 35

Denver at New England--I wonder how pissed off CBS is that they lose the Broncos to NBC two straight weeks.  You know what?  I don't care!  Flexing should be done for Monday night too.  Patriots 30, Broncos 27

San Francisco at Washington--I rest my case.  Niners 31, Redskins 20

Thursday Night Football--Week 12

Last week: 10-5
Season record: 106-57

To think that next week we get three games on Thursday, Thanksgiving Day!  But for tonight, we get what has turned out to be an abysmal match up. 

New Orleans at Atlanta--At some point you have to believe the Falcons are playing for draft position.  Or tonight, to help the Panthers.  And this all begs the question--why can't the NFL flex out of these Thursday night match ups on the, you know, NFL Network?  Saints 38, Falcons 24

NFL Week 11 picks

Last week: 7-7
Last night: 1-0
Season record: 97-52

Is it Sunday yet?  Luckily for me the Giants play Green Bay in the late afternoon game which means I get RZB for three hours--Red Zone Bliss.  On to the picks.....

Cleveland at Cincinnati--Have there been two teams harder to figure out from week to week?  Let's face it, the Bengals are probably going to the playoffs, the Browns probably are not (well, they still might).  But I think this is the time the Bengals have to start pulling away from the pack if they're gonna win the division.  Bengals 20, Browns 10

Oakland at Houston--I know that records don't lie, the Houston is not a 2-7 team.  And the Raiders are more like a 1-8 team than 3-6.  Or something.  I'm not sure if I made my point, but I just like the Texans here.  Texans 28, Raiders 20

Arizona at Jacksonville--Can the Jags really win two in a row?  I just don't see it.  Cards 19, Jags 16

Washington at Philadelphia--On the one hand, the Eagles of Nick Foles and Riley Cooper are surging.  On the other, they are 0-4 at home and haven't one at the Linc since September 2012.  Sometimes I just don't get the NFL.  Eagles 34, Redskins 31

Baltimore at Chicago--In a year of weird parity, these two teams are about as average as average gets.  But I guess I can't predict a tie.  Can I?  Ravens 26, Bears 23

NY Jets at Buffalo--Common wisdom would say pick the Jets.  Common wisdom says the Bills are always tough at home no matter who the opponent.  Common wisdom says flip a freaking coin.  Bills 21, Jets 20

Detroit at Pittsburgh--This Lions team smells the division title and while they did make the playoffs two years ago, a division crown would validate them as a true contender.  But not if they lose to the 3-7 Steelers.  Lions 24, Steelers 21

Atlanta at Tampa Bay--As bad as the Falcons have looked this year, and they are 0-4 on the road....the Bucs are just a crap sandwich who finally won a game last week.  But if they want that #1 pick, they'd better get back to crap sandwich.  Falcons 20, Bucs 14

San Diego at Miami--Two more hopelessly average teams, but ya know, when your team is rocked by scandal, it's hard to recover.  Chargers 23, Dolphins 17

San Francisco at New Orleans--A beauty, but believe it or not there is an even more compelling game than this one later in the day.  Saints 38, Niners 35

Minnesota at Seattle--This is the more compelling game I was referring to.  Ha!  Just kidding.  Seahawks 31, Vikings 10

Green Bay at NY Giants--This is not the piece of cake you would think for the Giants what with Scott Tolzien coming into the Meadowlands, because the Giants have a tendency to let third stringers beat them or at least make life difficult.  That being said, the Giants D is playing great and the Packers' D is not.  Giants 27,  Packers 24

Kansas City at Denver--Here it is, the game of the season so far--undefeated KC (9-0) traveling to division rival Denver to play Peyton Manning's 8-1 Broncos, the first meeting between the teams this season.  So the Broncos average 42 points a game and the Chiefs give up 12 points per game.  All signs point to a nail-biter so hopefully it lives up to the billing.  Broncos 20, Chiefs 16

New England at Carolina--Ten years after their Super Bowl, could their be a rematch brewing?  After the Panthers beat the Niners in Candlestick last week, there is a distinct buzz around the team.  Super Bowl aspirations could be slightly premature, but maybe not in this weird season.  Panthers 17, Patriots 13

Thursday Night Football--Week 11

Last week: 7-7
Season record: 96-52

The NFL continues to be baffling.  The Bucs and Jags won last week, so no team will finish 0-16.  The Chiefs are the only remaining unbeaten team at 9-0 but that could be in jeopardy on Sunday night as they travel to Denver to take on the 8-1 Broncos.  The weird upsets are puzzling to say the least and infuriating to some.  But it sure does make things interesting...like in a "what will happen next?" sort of way.  So with that, here is the pick for tonight's game:

Indianapolis at Tennessee--This used to be an intense rivalry in the days of Peyton Manning and Steve McNair.  One season those guys split the NFL MVP award.  Now it's Luck vs. Locker (or maybe Fitzpatrick).  It's getting exciting again as the Colts are (mostly) strong and the Titans have looked strong at a few points this season.  I feel like my gut is saying Titans.  But my head will disagree.  Don't punch me in the gut, Colts.  Colts 24, Titans 20

NFL Week 10 picks

Last week: 6-7
Last night: 0-1
Season record: 89-45

Alternate universe.  Upside down.  Strange.  These are the types of things you're hearing about the 2013 NFL season right now.  The Chiefs are 9-0 while the Giants and Steelers (and Falcons) are each 2-6.  Fantasy teams/players are also upside down and near impossible to predict from week to week.  So with that disclaimer in place, I give to you my probably-all-wrong picks for Week 10:

Oakland at NY Giants--I probably would have picked this one differently if the Giants hadn't have won two in a row before their bye week, and if the Raiders didn't get blown out at home against the Eagles last Sunday.  I'm still on the fence, because Terrell Pryor is the type of QB that gives the Giants fits, but I really don't see the Giants messing this up.  Giants 27, Raiders 20

Seattle at Atlanta--Times sure have changed since these teams met last season in the NFC playoffs.  Mainly, the Falcons have taken a nosedive.  Otherwise everything is peachy in Atlanta.  Seahawks 26, Falcons 17

Buffalo at Pittsburgh--Since the Bills are a cold weather team and they are traveling all the way down south to, um, Pittsburgh.....what, you don't get it?  Steelers 19, Bills 16

Cincinnati at Baltimore--This is the year that the Bengals may actually graduate from lucky wild card team to division winner/dominant AFC squad.  A win here would cement that.  Bengals 17, Ravens 13

Detroit at Chicago--The Lions have to still be glowing after their stunning come-from-behind win against Dallas last week.  The Bears have to be glowing after beating the Packers on Monday night without Jay Cutler.  Your guess is as good as mine.  Lions 34, Bears 30

Philadelphia at Green Bay--The Eagles are 0-4 at home and 4-1 on the road.  Weird?  Not so much in 2013.  Packers 23, Eagles 20

St. Louis at Indianapolis--The Colts are on a roll and they may not stop until January.  The Rams are on a losing roll.  Colts 31, Rams 10

Jacksonville at Tennessee--Does the thought of this game make you sleepy?  Titans 20, Jaguars 10

Carolina at San Francisco--It's amazing to think that this could be a potential playoff match up.  No, seriously.  Niners 17, Panthers 16

Denver at San Diego--The Broncos average 43 points a game.  FORTY THREE.  Broncos 43, Chargers 30

Houston at Arizona--The Texans are another shockingly bad team this year.  And the Cards are shockingly 4-4.  Cardinals 28, Texans 25

Dallas at New Orleans--Oh boy, we get to hear Cris Collinsworth drool all over Tony Romo and Sean Lee.  Thankfully we also get to see Romo intercept his way to a Saints' win.  Saints 38, Cowboys 35


Miami at Tampa Bay--I'm quite sure my six-year old boy even knows this is a crappy game.  Hell, my cat knows this is a crappy game.  Dolphins 21, Bucs 16

Thursday Night Football--Week 10

Last week: 6-7
Season record: 89-44

I think the whole world had a crappy Week 9.  Can we just hit the reset button on some or all of this NFL season?  No, huh?  Okay, let's plunge into Week 10....

Washington at Minnesota--It's amazing to think the Vikings have one win, and that was in the UK.  The Skins have underachieved but have looked better as of late with RG3's knees healing.  Well, healing except for when he's being body-slammed to the turf like in that game against San Diego last Sunday.  I have no idea where I'm going with this, and I bet neither do you.  Redskins 27, Vikings 23

NFL Week 9 picks

Last week: 10-3
Last night: 0-1
Season record: 83-38

Parity is alive and well in the NFL, folks.  How else do you explain a team like the Bengals whooping the Jets 49-9 one week and then dropping behind 17-3 to a team like the Dolphins who have lost three in a row, only to come back to go ahead 20-17 and then lose on a safety in OT?  It makes picking these games harder and harder, which of course makes it more fun and a crapshoot....

Kansas City at Buffalo--You know, the Chiefs just cannot possibly go 16-0, can they?  For one thing, they have not yet played Denver. But I have a sneaking suspicion they will suffer their first loss against this scrappy Buffalo squad on the road.  Bills 23, Chiefs 20

Tennessee at St. Louis--Lookie here, the 1999 Super Bowl teams!  But the guy coaching the Titans then is coaching the Rams now.  This just feels weird.  Rams 13, Titans 10

New Orleans at NY Jets--Parity sure does mess with your head.  I look at this one and I think the Jets may pull off an upset.  I won't pick it, but let's just say I wouldn't be surprised.  Oh, and hey, it's Rob vs. Rex!  Saints 27, Jets 20

San Diego at Washington--I mean seriously, your guess is as good as mine.  Redskins 24, Chargers 21

Minnesota at Dallas--As a Giants fan, I look at this game and I just hope against hope that the Cowboys will flame out, and let's face it, with Romo you just never know.  Cowboys 27, Vikings 16

Atlanta at Carolina--That Panthers D is suddenly looking mighty stingy, giving up 13.7 per game.  Atlanta is giving up twice that, and have Harry Douglas as their top WR target.  Panthers 20, Falcons 13

Tampa Bay at Seattle--You just know one of those Lane Kiffin moments is coming, right?  Like the Bucs' GM will tell Greg Schiano to get off the plane and find his own way home.  Seahawks 31, Bucs 3

Philadelphia at Oakland--I watched the Giants/Eagles game last week and let's just say I'm floored with how bad Chip Kelly's boys look.  Then again, they are 0-4 at home and 3-1 on the road.  The Raiders are the opposite--3-1 at home and 0-3 on the road.  Something's gotta give and Terrell Pryor is on fire.  Raiders 24, Eagles 20

Pittsburgh at New England--Some things never change, like the Pats' success at Foxboro (4-0 this year).  Some things do change, like the Steelers, who look as bad as I can ever remember.  Patriots 27, Steelers 13

Baltimore at Cleveland--Is it too far in the past to say this is the "old Browns" against the "new Browns?"  I know the city of Cleveland still has no use for the Purple Art Modells.  Ravens 17, Browns 16

Indianapolis at Houston--Stay close to your phone.  The Texans may need another QB soon.  Colts 31, Texans 24

Chicago at Green Bay--The classic match up, on the frozen tundra of Lambeau Field.  I'm not quite sure if it matters if Jay Cutler plays or not, the Bears are in their typical mid-season swoon.  Packers 38, Bears 20

Thursday Night Football pick: Week 9

Last week: 10-3
Season record: 83-37

Cincinnati at Miami--Didn't Miami start out 3-0?  I feel like they do that every year before coasting backward into mediocrity.  As for the Bengals, they never seem to get the respect they deserve, but boy do they look good right now--sort of like the Seattle of the AFC.  I think you know where this is going....Bengals 26, Dolphins 13

NFL Week 8 picks

Last week: 9-6
Last night: 0-1
Season record: 73-35

So I am done picking the Bucs.  Greg Schiano may not be coaching that team at the end of the season, or maybe not even in November.  The NFL may also be calling for the three Florida teams (combined record of 0-17) to secede from the league.  Yikes.  Anyway, here are the rest of this week's picks.....

NY Giants at Philadelphia--There is no doubt that the Giants will try to use that Monday night first win of the season against a hapless Vikings team to give them false hope that they can beat their nemesis Eagles.  And there is no doubt they will revert to their losing ways.  Eagles 31, Giants 23

San Francisco "at" Jacksonville--Maybe the Jags will improve by leaving their suckitude in the Atlantic Ocean on the way to London where they will "host" the Niners.  Nah, suckitude cannot and will not be shed.  Maybe ever.  Niners 33, Jags 10

Dallas at Detroit--I mean, it's Thanksgiving somewhere, right?  Cowboys 37, Lions 34

Cleveland at Kansas City--The only thing that could backfire here is the Chiefs overlooking the Browns.  Oh wait, Brandon Weeden.  Chiefs 23, Browns 16

Miami at New England--It's getting to be that time of year when the warm weather teams get obliterated by cold weather teams in cold weather stadiums.  Patriots 23, Dolphins 10

Buffalo at New Orleans--Another win streak begins.  Saints 31, Bills 17

Pittsburgh at Oakland--Does this have a '70's feel to it?  Not really, because both of these teams are not very good.  Raiders 17, Steelers 16

NY Jets at Cincinnati--There is no doubt in my mind that Rex is not overconfident after beating the Pats.  Bengals 21, Jets 14

Washington at Denver--Uh-oh.  That Indy loss has relegated Peyton to sleeping in the film room all week.  Broncos 38, Redskins 27

Atlanta at Arizona--There isn't a yawn gif big enough to show how I feel about this one.  Cards 20, Falcons 17

Green Bay at Minnesota--What, we have to watch Josh Freeman on national TV two weeks in a row?  These games need to be all flex, all the time.  Packers 30, Vikings 17

Seattle at St. Louis--Another Monday night pile of crap.  Seahawks 24, Rams 6

Thursday Night Football pick: Week 8

Last week: 9-6
Season record: 73-34

I'd like to pretend it's not already Week 8.  That means we are literally almost halfway through the NFL season, and that is rather sad.  But hey!  If we go glass-half-full here, we can just say that there is still a lot of football to be played.  Because there is, right?  Starting with another semi-stinker....

Carolina at Tampa Bay--I don't want to say that what goes around comes around, but Greg Schiano is kind of a douche.  And you know the saying--winners never douche, and douches never win.  Or something.  Still, I think they figure out a way to get it done at home on national TV.  Bucs 24, Panthers 20

Week 7 Picks

Last week: 10-5
Last night: 1-0
Season record: 65-28

Can you believe it's Week 7 already?  I hate how fast the football season goes.  We are literally halfway to the end of the fantasy football season too unless you are playoff-bound (I'm definitely not in either league) or if you do playoff fantasy football (I do and it's awesome...hit me up if you are interested in playing this year).  Meanwhile, here are the picks for this week.....

San Diego at Jacksonville--The race is on.  Will the Giants, Jags or Bucs run the table to 0-16?  My money is on these guys.  Chargers 27, Jaguars 13

Cincinnati at Detroit--This should be interesting, but there is a chance the Bengals' D can hold the Lions' O to under 10 points the way Green Bay did.  Or they can be sloppy like they were against Buffalo.  Bengals 23, Lions 17

Buffalo at Miami--Wow, is Thad Lewis for real?  Did they skip right over that Jeff Tuel dude?  Anyway, the Bills looked semi-explosive last week against the Bengals.  The Dolphins have to be one of the NFL teams I least want to watch play.  Dolphins 17, Bills 16

Tampa Bay at Atlanta--Will Greg Schiano be fired after this game or will he last a few more?  The countdown is on.  Falcons 30, Bucs 10

New England at NY Jets--Whenever I think of this rivalry, I think of Spygate.  Seriously though, does Belichick really need an advantage like that over Rex?  Patriots 28, Jets 20

Dallas at Philadelphia--These two teams are actually battling for first place, which is remarkable considering how bad the Eagles have looked at times.  Both teams are 2-0 against the division, so something's gotta give.  So home team wins.  Eagles 27, Cowboys 24

Chicago at Washington--I realize the Redskins have problems, but I really don't think they are as bad as 1-4, especially not with RG3 getting healthy.  Redskins 20, Bears 16

St. Louis at Carolina--Wake me up when it's over.  Panthers 21, Rams 14

San Francisco at Tennessee--This is an extremely intriguing match up with two pretty good defenses.  And I have a funny feeling about it.  Titans 16, Niners 13

Cleveland at Green Bay--When the Browns start Brandon Weeden, they are noticeably worse than when starting Brian Hoyer.  So there.  Packers 31, Browns 14

Houston at Kansas City--The Chiefs are giving up less than 11 points per game.  The Texans are frankly a train wreck right now.  You do the math.  Chiefs 23, Texans 10

Baltimore at Pittsburgh--So the Steelers won a game last week, and are 1-4, yet if they beat the Ravens at home Sunday, they will trail them by a half game and possibly be 1.5 out of first place.  And the crazy thing is, it very well could happen.  Steelers 19, Ravens 17

Denver at Indianapolis--This could be the game of the year so far.  Peyton Manning returns to Indy to play in a different uniform for the first time.  Andrew Luck tries to steer the home team past the home fans' former stud.  Don't look away, you might miss something here.  Broncos 33, Colts 27

Minnesota at NY Giants--Memo to ESPN.  You should try to lure away the person at NBC who keeps getting the better prime time match ups each week.  Seriously, these two teams are a combined 1-10.  Vikings 27, Giants 24

Thursday Night Football pick: Week 7

Last week: 10-5
Season record: 64-28

What a great game we have on tap tonight!  At least that's what NFL Network would want you to believe. 

Seattle at Arizona--Seattle is good.  But they have looked vulnerable at times.  Arizona is not good.  But they have looked like they could beat anyone recently.  When in doubt, we must simply pick the better team.  Seahawks 23, Cardinals 17

NFL Week 6 picks

Last week: 9-5
Last night: 1-0
Season record: 55-23

Damn.  I have picked the Giants to lose every game and they keep losing.  One of these days I want to be wrong, but they haven't given me much hope that they can avoid shooting themselves in the foot.  Anyway, on to the rest of the games....

Cincinnati at Buffalo--Cincinnati chili vs. Buffalo chicken wings.  I'll take the wings, please.  And I'll take the Bengals, please.  Bengals 19, Bills 16

St. Louis at Houston--I appreciate Jeff Fisher's confidence, but no matter if you play 11 games or 16, you aren't gonna leapfrog the Niners and Seahawks.  Oh, and what the hell is wrong with Matt Schaub?  Texans 23, Rams 17

Carolina at Minnesota--Ron Rivera has that look on his face like "I can't believe my team sucks this bad."  When they are not playing the Giants, that is.  Vikings 27, Panthers 20

Pittsburgh at NY Jets--This has to be one of those games that the Steelers actually have a shot in, don't they?  Well unfortunately for them, the Jets don't suck like they did with Sanchez butt fumbling.  Yeah, that was rock bottom.  Jets 24, Steelers 13

Philadelphia at Tampa Bay--What goes around comes around, Schiano.  All the Eagles needed was the Giants to gain some confidence.  Are you sensing a theme here?  Eagles 34, Bucs 21

Oakland at Kansas City--Wouldn't it be funny if the Rai--  Uh, no.  Chiefs 20, Raiders 10

Green Bay at Baltimore--These are two very tough teams to figure out.  But Mike McCarthy's Packers found their defense last week and that could spell trouble for the Ravens.  Packers 30, Ravens 24

Detroit at Cleveland--You read that correctly--the 3-2 Lions visit the 3-2 Browns.  What year is this, 1957?  I mean, the Giants have more losses than both these teams combined.  Lions 28, Browns 27

Tennessee at Seattle--Mike Munchak's Titans are improved, but my ears are ringing already thinking about the noise in that stadium Sunday.  No matter what, you can't prepare for that.  Seahawks 26, Titans 13

Jacksonville at Denver--Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.  Ha.  Ha ha.  Ha ha ha.  Ha.  And um, ha.  Ha ha.
Broncos 42, Jaguars 10

New Orleans at New England--Cajun Man meets Chowder Head.   If the Saints were gonna lose one, this would be a candidate.  Patriots 31, Saints 27

Arizona at San Francisco--Wait, the Cardinals are 3-2 and so are the Niners?  How did that happen?  Well, it's time for a little separation.  Niners 27, Cards 14

Washington at Dallas--A beauty of a Sunday night game.  Forget the fact that the Skins are 1-3.  They could jump into first place if they win and the Eagles lose.  Boy, this division sucks.  But the rivalry here never does.  Washington 30, Dallas 27

Indianapolis at San Diego--Wait, the Colts are 4-1?  And we know Andrew Luck can play, but Indy is giving up less than 16 points a game.  Raise your hand if you saw that coming.  Not you, Pagano...just anyone else.  Colts 27, Chargers 20

Thursday Night Football pick: Week 6

Last week: 9-5
Season record: 54-23

There sure were some weird outcomes last week.  But hey, 9-5 ain't bad, eh?  Now it's right back to work, for me....the Giants...and the Bears. 

NY Giants at Chicago--If you visualize it, it should happen, right?  I keep envisioning the Giants being 0-6.  Does that mean it already happened?  Let's just put it this way--the Giants are bad.  Real, real bad.  And at 0-5 you have to believe they are going to just go through the motions the rest of the way.  And no offense to the Bears, but if they find a way to blow this game, the fork may not be in them, but it will be on the table.  Bears 38, Giants 17

NFL Week 5 picks

Last week: 12-3
Last night: 1-0
Season record: 46-18

Jacksonville at St. Louis--You know, part of me wonders if Sam Bradford will ever be all that he was cracked up to be.  Of course, the Jags are coming to town so he may look better than usual Sunday.  Rams 23, Jaguars 16

Kansas City at Tennessee--One of the unexpected great games this week, the 4-0 Chiefs traveling to 3-1 Tennessee.  Shhhh, don't tell Andy Reid about the barbecue in Nashville.  Titans 20, Chiefs 17

Philadelphia at NY Giants--One of the fringe benefits of being a fan of an 0-4 Giants team?  We may possibly go the entire season without having to endure Joe Buck and Troy Aikman.  That in itself is a victory.  Eagles 34, Giants 14

Baltimore at Miami--Are the Dolphins really for real or did the Saints game expose them?  Are the Ravens really as bad as they have appeared?  This game will answer both, but the Ravens are 0-2 on the road, so.....Dolphins 19, Ravens 16

Seattle at Indianapolis--Boy, this is a tough one.  Seattle is 4-0 with points for/against at 109/47.  Indy is 3-1 with PF/PA of 105/51, allowing just 10 points in the last two weeks.  Hey, this might be a good game!  Seahawks 28, Colts 20

Detroit at Green Bay--I know the Lions don't suck as much as they have before, but it's Lambeau and you can throw the standings out the window.  Packers 38, Lions 31

New England at Cincinnati--If the Pats can beat the Falcons in Atlanta, they do have a shot to be 5-0.  But somehow I just don't think so.  Bengals 24, Patriots 23

New Orleans at Chicago--Damn, this is another good one.  I'm seriously thinking Red Zone instead of watching the Giants get blown out again.  Saints 32, Bears 30

Carolina at Arizona--There are a few teams I have zero interest in watching.  The Cards are one, and the Panthers are in the grouping after that.  And I still don't get why they can't give us less early games and more late games.  But whatever!  Cardinals 20, Panthers 16

Denver at Dallas--I'd say Dallas has a shot at an upset, but I mean, the Broncos are averaging 45 points a game.  That's insane.  Broncos 37, Cowboys 30

Houston at San Francisco--Two underachieving teams square off to see who is a bigger (or is it smaller?) underachiever.  Niners 24, Texans 21

San Diego at Oakland--You read that correctly, folks--a second Sunday night game, beginning at 11:35pm ET.  You west coasters will find out what it's like to finish watching a game after midnight like east coasters do every Sunday and Monday night.  And you hard core east coasters will see what it's like to finish watching a game after 3am.  Sweet.  Chargers 27, Raiders 21

NY Jets at Atlanta--The Jets are not as good as 2-2 and the Falcons are not as bad as 1-3.  If you do the math.....Falcons 27, Jets 10

Thursday Night Football Pick: Week 5

Last week: 12-3
Season record: 45-18

Buffalo at Cleveland--When the season began and we saw that EJ Manuel was starting at QB for the Bills, and then we saw the Browns absolutely suck for their first two games and then trade Trent Richardson--you could have looked ahead and thought that this game would be a total train wreck.  It still might be, but both teams are 2-2 and the Browns are re-born with Brian Hoyer at QB and the return of WR Josh Gordon (until they trade him too).  After the Indians lost the wild card game last night, Cleveland could use a jolt, and they will get it.  Browns 24, Bills 17

NFL Week 4 picks

Last week: 8-8
Last night: 1-0
Season record: 34-15

So tooting one's own horn is acceptable when it can be backed up, right?  I should mention then, that I am a perfect 4-0 on Thursday night games. Of course, maybe last week's overall 8-8 should sober me a bit, so I'll save my real gloating for next week.  Meanwhile, here are the rest of the games and my prognostications....

Chicago at Detroit--Right off the bat, a tough one.  Does anyone else find the Bears (3-0) and Lions (2-1) atop in the NFC North, above Green Bay (1-2) mildly apocalyptic?  Lions 34, Bears 30

Baltimore at Buffalo--No truth to the rumor that a suit-clad Ray Lewis will be traveling with the Ravens on all road trips.  Bills 23, Ravens 20

Seattle at Houston--It would be sentimental to pick the home team here, but let's be real.  The Seahawks are giving up 9 points per game.  Nine.  Ironically that's the same number the Texans scored against Baltimore last week.  So I don't think this bodes well.  Seahawks 27, Texans 13

Cincinnati at Cleveland--I can't think of this match up without thinking of Sam Wyche grabbing a microphone and telling the fans of Cincinnati to stop being barbaric like the fans in Cleveland after they were being unruly.  Pretty soon I'll be telling some young "whippersnapper" to get off my lawn.  Bengals 19, Browns 10

Indianapolis at Jacksonville--Can't the Jags just sign Tim Tebow already?  Colts 27, Jaguars 17

NY Giants at Kansas City--I am a Giants fan, and I have to point out that I've sadly picked them to lose each week so far and have been correct each time.  It breaks my heart to be right sometimes.  Chiefs 30, Giants 16

Arizona at Tampa Bay--Oooh, set your DVRs for this one!  Bucs 20, Cardinals 14

Pittsburgh at Minnesota--Egads, we will have one less winless team after Sunday.  Unless this one ends in a tie.  And I really don't want to think that's possible.  Vikings 23, Steelers 20

NY Jets at Tennessee--Both teams are 2-1.  The Jets are winning on average by an 18-17 margin.  The Titans are winning by a 20-19 margin.  Points seem to be down everywhere.  Are offensive coordinators asleep?  Titans 20, Jets 16

Washington at Oakland--Boy I'd hate to the the Raiders' D right now.  They are about to have RG3 open up the can of whoop ass in his back pocket.  Redskins 34, Raiders 17

Philadelphia at Denver--This should be fun.  Chip Kelly hasn't figured out how to play defense and the Broncs are averaging 42 points a game.  Broncos 37, Eagles 30

Dallas at San Diego--I know I picked the Giants to lose, but if they win and Dallas loses, the Giants will be one game out of first place.  The NFC East has sure taken a dive.  Chargers 20, Cowboys 17

New England at Atlanta--The first of two prime time match ups between the AFC East and NFC South, and this one should be a beauty.  But I'm sorry Mr. Brady and Mr. Belichick, the Falcons just don't lose at home very often.  Falcons 30, Patriots 27

Miami at New Orleans--I kind of can't believe that MNF didn't wind up with Arizona and Tampa Bay this week.  They actually landed a watchable game between two 3-0 teams.  Saints 26, Dolphins 20

Bye week bonus blabbery:
Green Bay Packers--After coming back from 14-0 down last week and scoring 30 straight unanswered points to allowing 20 more unanswered points to lose 34-30 to the Bengals, the Packers are left at 1-2 wondering who cut the cheese.

Carolina Panthers--That drubbing of the Giants saved Ron Rivera's ass for two whole weeks when you take the bye into account.  Maybe three with the Cardinals looming next week.

Thursday Night Football Pick: Week 4

Last week: 8-8
Season record: 33-15

It's hard to imagine anyone did well last week with all of the crazy upsets.  Or maybe I'm trying to justify my mediocre showing.  Whatever, it's a new week!  So let's get it started....

San Francisco at St. Louis--Now this one I didn't see coming.  The Niners beat Green Bay in the opener in a hard-fought game in which Anquan Boldin had over 200 yards receiving and a few touchdowns.  Since then, Big Red has scored 10 points in two games.  Being held to a field goal in Seattle, okay.  But only scoring 7 and losing bad to the Colts at home?  Yikes.  Meanwhile, the Rams are still not there.  They fight hard, and have a good coach, but they're not very good and they are about to get whooped on Thursday Night Football at home.  Niners 38, Rams 20

NFL Week 3 Picks

Last week: 14-2
Last night: 1-0
Season record: 26-7

Houston at Baltimore--I hope the folks in Baltimore are happy that they now have two Lombardi trophies, because they may be in for a drought now that half the team has bolted.  One of those who bolted, one Ed Reed, returns to face his former team.  Giddy up.  Texans 23, Ravens 17

NY Giants at Carolina--The Giants are now two years removed from their latest miracle championship run.  And they look BAD.  You can only shoot yourselves in the foot so many times before that foot just falls off.  But their opponent this week is also not very good.  Panthers 19, Giants 16

Detroit at Washington--It's bleak in DC yet let's face it, there is a good chance every NFC East team could be 1-2 after Sunday.  And you just know RG3 is going to turn things around at some point.  Just make sure to triple team Mr. Suh on Sunday.  Redskins 27, Lions 24

San Diego at Tennessee--Dear Antonio Gates....stop f--king with me.  I draft you, put you in my lineup, you do nothing.  I bench you, you put up 100 yards.  You play against me, you kill me.  You only suck when you are on my team and in my lineup.  Chargers 24, Titans 20

Arizona at New Orleans--Scale of 1 to 10, how happy is Drew Brees that his Daddy Payton is back?  15?   Saints 37, Cards 20

Tampa Bay at New England--The "tick tock" of Greg Schiano's firing timer is getting loud.  It's okay to act like a douche if you win, but losing douches...nobody likey.  Patriots 21, Bucs 10

Green Bay at Cincinnati--Quietly this is looking like one of the best games of the week.  The Pack's offense against the Bengals' D.  But don't sleep on Andy Dalton and AJ Green and some dude named Giovanni von Parmegiano.  Or something.  Bengals 26, Packers 24

St. Louis at Dallas--The Rams actually look competitive, something we are not used to seeing since, you know, the days of Kurt Warner.  I think Jeff Fisher is maybe the most under-appreciated coaches of all time.  And I'd love to see him knock the 'Boys down a peg in the Jerry World.  Cowboys 19, Rams 16

Cleveland at Minnesota--If that move of trading Trent Richardson wasn't a blatant attempt to get the top pick in the draft in 2014, I don't know what is.  And the Vikings will be happy to help them get there in their home opener.  Vikings 27, Browns 7

Atlanta at Miami--I wonder what Michael Turner is doing these days.  He should probably keep his phone handy.  Falcons 20, Dolphins 17

Buffalo at NY Jets--Seriously, where did this EJ Manuel kid come from?  I have a lot of friends that are Jets fans, and they are eternally miserable.  But that goes for Bills' fans too.  And I just don't trust Geno Smith to not throw four interceptions, and I don't trust the Jets' D to stop EJ and Stevie and CJ.
Bills 28, Jets 16

Indianapolis at San Francisco--Yowza, this is an interesting match up.  Jim Harbaugh is about to face his young protege from Stanford in Andrew Luck.  And he's going to throw a pretty good defense at him.  Trent Richardson will play.  Kaepernick and Anquan may return to Week 1 glory.  Niners 34, Colts 17

Jaguars at Seahawks--Remember that video of Randy Johnson throwing a 100 mph fastball and a poor bird getting in its path and basically disintegrating upon impact?  The Seahawks are Johnson and the Jags are the bird.  Seahawks 41, Jaguars 3

Chicago at Pittsburgh--I saw the Steelers' offense on a milk carton the other day.  I seriously hope they have the Jaguars on their schedule this year or they may fight the Browns for that top pick. Okay, so maybe let's not get carried away.  I think they actually find a way to win this one.  Steelers 20, Bears 14

Oakland at Denver--Denver is averaging 45 points a game.  Peyton Manning will not throw for 7 touchdowns this time, but maybe 5.  Broncos 35, Raiders 10

Thursday Night Football Pick: Week 3

Last week: 14-2
Season record: 25-7

Kansas City at Philadelphia--Boy, the NFL Network struck gold with this one.  This is the return of Andy Reid to Philadelphia eight months after being canned by the Eagles.  Reid coached the Eagles for 14 years, taking them to the playoffs several times and to the Super Bowl in 2004.  Suffice to say he may know a thing or too about most of the Philly players.  Sure, he's never coached against the riverboat gambler, Chip Kelly, but he has to have some sort of advantage.  Plus, his Chiefs are surprising everyone with a 2-0 start, matching last season's win total already.  The Chiefs are strong on both sides of the ball, and the Eagles are flying high on offense yet MIA on D, so Alex Smith and Jamaal Charles may shred them.  Of course, Kelly will try to tire out the Chiefs' D and try to set a record for the shortest elapsed time for a scoring drive.  Chiefs 34, Eagles 33

NFL Week 2 predictions

Last week: 11-5
Last night: 1-0
Season record: 12-5

So we're already heading into Week 2.  Man, I hope the season slows down so we can savor it a bit more.  But I think that's the key.  We have to savor it now.  Think about how you are going to feel sitting on your couch next July watching meaningless baseball games, golf, tennis and competitive eating.  Yeah, that's when the football jones hits me the hardest.  So yeah...hey you!  Get ready for some serious Red Zone action and four late games this week as opposed to the paltry two last week.  With that, let's look into Mikey's Crystal Ball.....

Oh wait, I'd be remiss if I didn't throw this out there....what number will be greater at the end of the season--the Patriots' wins, or the number of times Tom Brady's head explodes when his receivers drop passes or break routes off?  Yikes. 

St. Louis at Atlanta--Here is the one statistic Jeff Fisher needs to know....there are three things that are inevitable--death, taxes, and the Falcons winning at home.  Falcons 27, Rams 13

San Diego at Philadelphia--I hope the San Diego defense packs their track suits for this game.  And with home adrenaline, you just might see that Eagles offense blow the visor right off Chip Kelly's head.  Eagles 38, Chargers 17

Dallas at Kansas City--Poor Andy Reid.  He gets relegated to coach an AFC West team and has to play the Cowboys, Eagles and Giants back to back in Weeks 2, 3 and 4.  I'm already getting my popcorn ready for his return to Philly on Thursday.  Chiefs 22, Cowboys 19

Miami at Indianapolis--These two teams are a bit hard to figure out.  Miami played against an awful Browns team last week and squeaked out a win on the road.  The Colts looked like they would roll the Raiders as everyone expected and came damn close to letting Terrelle Pryor roll them.  Colts 24, Dolphins 17

Tennessee at Houston--I'm sorry.  I just don't see the Titans pitching another virtual shutout this week.  The Texans actually have a running game unlike the Steelers did last week.  Texans 30, Titans 20

Washington at Green Bay--Oh, baby.  RG3 at Lambeau for the first time.  First of all, the Packers' high flying offense will look like an RA Dickey knuckleball compared to the Eagles last week.  Secondly, if the Shanahans leave their star QB out there for too long again, they will need Dr. Andrews on permanent payroll.  Packers 34, Redskins 27

Cleveland at Baltimore--At least the Ravens lost to a decent team last week.  I feel for all my buds in Cleveland having to watch another season of crappy football.  Ravens 23, Browns 16

Carolina at Buffalo--I take back what I said about EJ Manuel last week.  He looked real good in almost leading his team to an upset against the Pats.  Bills 21, Panthers 20

Minnesota at Chicago--Who doesn't love NFC North games?  The only thing better is an NFC North game outdoors in December.  Or January.  Okay, so neither of these teams will be playing in January. Bears 26, Vikings 23

New Orleans at Tampa Bay--On paper, this should be a laugher.  But New Orleans is far more vulnerable on the road.  Oh wait, this is the Bucs.  Saints 30, Bucs 17

Detroit at Arizona--Larry Fitzgerald has to feel like a kid on Christmas, since Santa brought him Carson Palmer.  Cardinals 24, Lions 21

Jacksonville at Oakland--Please don't get your popcorn ready for this one.  Raiders 27, Jaguars 14

Denver at NY Giants--As a Giants fan, I so want Eli to stick it in his big brother's eye once and for all.  But you guys who want to debate which one is better, just watch this game.  I love the Giants and that Eli has led us to two championships, but just watch this game.  The Giants' secondary is banged up and awful too, so Peyton might throw for eight touchdowns this week.  Okay, five.  Broncos 38, Giants 27

San Francisco at Seattle--Clearly we have two teams that are the class of the NFC.  I just hope this one is as good as advertised.  Seahawks 20, Niners 19

Pittsburgh at Cincinnati--Don't look now, every team in the AFC North is 0-1, and therefore tied for first place.  In Pittsburgh, terrible is not just used to describe towels after last week.  Bengals 20, Steelers 13

Thursday Night Football Pick Week 2

Last week: 11-5
Season record: 11-5

NY Jets at New England--Last week may have shown us that the Jets are not as bad as everyone thought (well okay they barely beat a semi-crappy Bucs team).  It also may have shown us how the Pats are vulnerable, but also how they manage to find ways to win.  We may want to keep an eye on the stormy weather in the Northeast too...rain and wind could wreak havoc for both teams.  Patriots 23, Jets 17

NFL Week 1 predictions

Ah, the first NFL Sunday is almost upon us.  You can smell the pigskin in the air.  You can smell barbecue grills firing up.  You can smell the crap of your crappy teams before they even take the field.  You know who you are, though you might say every team has a crap factor.  Enjoy the games everyone....

Season record: 1-0 

New England at Buffalo--For whatever crazy reason, the Bills play the Pats tough, especially at home.  But let's face it--the Bills are starting EJ Manuel at QB and have a guy named Jeff Tuel backing him up.  And I just can't go against Brady and Belichick in Week 1.  Patriots 35, Bills 20

Tennessee at Pittsburgh--Does anyone remember Chris Johnson, you know, CJ2K?  Do the Steelers even have to game plan for him anymore?   Steelers 20, Titans 16

Atlanta at New Orleans--And so begins the comeback trail of head coach Sean Payton.  I know everyone likes the Falcons and for good reason, but I like the Saints to reclaim this division with a solid 12-4 record, starting with this game here.  Saints 38, Falcons 33

Tampa Bay at NY Jets--Fistfight alert!  When you put Rex Ryan and Greg Schiano on the field together, you are risking one of those awkward handshake moments after the game.  Bucs 16, Jets 10

Kansas City at Jacksonville--It's amazing to me that you put Andy Reid in charge and sign Alex Smith, and suddenly the Chiefs are a wild card team?  Does the AFC suck that badly?  Chiefs 20, Jaguars 17

Seattle at Carolina--Seattle is a trendy Super Bowl pick this year, and I already can't wait to see them play the Niners next week.  But first they must travel to Charlotte (or wherever the hell the Panthers play) and deal with Cam Newton.  Seahawks 23, Panthers 13

Cincinnati at Chicago--I feel for Bears fans, and Cubs fans.  I really do.  Every year they have their hopes up only to be squashed in craptastic fashion.  Jay Cutler embodies that.  And so it begins, new coach and all.  Bengals 27, Bears 19

Miami at Cleveland--Finally Cleveland gets to avenge that awful Game 7 of the '97 World Series in which the Marlins broke Indians' fans hearts.  Oh, say what?  Wrong sport?  Browns 26, Dolphins 23

Minnesota at Detroit--The Lions seem to be another trendy pick as they added Reggie Bush.  But before you even hand off to that dude, you have to worry about spotting the Vikes two Adrian Peterson TDs early.  It could happen.  Lions 35, Vikings 31

Oakland at Indianapolis--Holy crap there are a lot of early games.  I love that my Giants are playing at night so I can be in Red Zone bliss the whole afternoon.  Oh, and Andrew Luck will be a Top 5 or maybe Top 3 QB this year.  Colts 45, Raiders 10

Green Bay at San Francisco--I wanna pick my hometown team, I really do.  But they are on the road against a Niners team that is becoming really easy to hate.  Niners 27, Packers 24

Arizona at St. Louis--Okay, so that was cruel, Roger Goodell.  You give us ten games early and then at 4:00 ET you give us a great game along with this abomination.  Hey Goodell, you suck!  Rams 19, Cards 16

NY Giants at Dallas--For all the talk about how bad Dallas' defense is, the Giants' secondary is a freaking mess.  So is their red zone offense, which means David Wilson is going to have to break a few long ones.  Cowboys 34, Giants 22

Philadelphia at Washington--This one should be a beauty.  The return of RG3 and Chip Kelly brings Michael Vick and LeSean McCoy to DC.  Redskins 31, Eagles 27

Houston at San Diego--I took Arian Foster with the second pick in my fantasy draft.  Everyone thinks I'm stupid, but they won't when they see those typical Arian Foster numbers, nagging injuries and Ben Tate committee be damned.  Texans 28, Chargers 17

NFL Kickoff Game: Week 1

Holy freaking crap.  The NFL season starts tonight, and I have to be honest.  For as long the offseason usually is and seems, this one seemed to blow right by.  For the most part, anyway.  Anyway, here we are, and I hope you'll join me in predicting the games and heckling me for my predictions.  I'm going to also do the Thursday games day of and the rest of the games on Friday.
With that, let's get to it....

Baltimore at Denver--I had to check to make sure this was correct.  The Super Bowl champs are supposed to host the kickoff game, right?  I guess not this time.  The champion Ravens are visiting the Broncos in the mile high city in a playoff rematch from January.  You may remember this was a remarkable game in which the Ravens shocked Peyton Manning's Broncos in this very stadium.  Don't think Manning and John Fox and John Elway don't remember that.  But these new-look Ravens are not going to suck, Super Bowl curse be damned.  Still, I just don't see them sending all those Broncos fans home pissed off tonight.  Broncos 31, Ravens 27

NFL Picks: Super Bowl 47

Well this is it, folks.  Even the Pro Bowl has already been played, so the Super Bowl is the final final game of the 2012 campaign.  It comes down to two teams, both coached by a guy named Harbaugh.  So let's get to it......

Last Week (2 weeks ago): 1-1
Playoff Record: 5-5
Season Record: 170-96

Baltimore vs. San Francisco--I think I have picked against the Ravens every time during the postseason, and every time they have proven me wrong.  Now they have to face a Niners team that is as explosive offensively as any team they have faced this season now that Colin Kaepernick is at the helm, and with a defense that makes life miserable for opposing QBs and RBs.  Meanwhile, Ray Lewis will see how much he can muster in his final NFL game, and if Joe Flacco and Ray Rice and a solid group of receivers and tight ends can carry the Ravens offensively again.  I want to pick the Ravens, but my head just won't let me do it.  Niners 27, Ravens 24

NFL Picks: Championship Weekend

Well, we've come to that point in the season--the point in which you just know the end of the football season is near.  There are few things in life that should not be taken as seriously as we football fans take our football, but we just can't help it.  So I have to ask, because last week I predicted we'd be seeing Brady vs. Manning on Sunday.  Hey John Fox, what was THAT?  There is conservative, and then there is dumbass.  And that was a bit plate of dumbass.  The Broncos signed Peyton Manning to get them a championship, and instead of putting the ball in his hands with 31 seconds and two timeouts and a short distance for Matt Prater's field goal range, they take a knee, obliterating the 31 seconds and the timeouts, and eventually lose the game in double OT.  If you're a Ravens fan, you should send John Fox a thank you note.  What's more, John Elway reportedly had Fox's back.  Hey Elway, would you have been okay taking a knee in that situation?  That's what I thought.  Now the picks....

Last Week: 2-2
Playoff Record: 4-4
Season Record: 169-95

San Francisco at Atlanta--With all due respect to the Seahawks, Atlanta has not seen a team as deep on both sides of the ball as the Niners.  And let's face it--the Falcons almost choked away the game last week, which would have made it possibly one of the worst choke jobs ever, and would have had everyone calling Mike Smith and Matt Ryan chokers forever.  The Niners can run, they can pass and their QB is fast and elusive and will give the Falcons fits the way Russell Wilson did.  And they can play D as well as anyone the Falcons have faced this season.  Niners 34, Falcons 24

Baltimore at New England--A rematch of last year's game, but the Ravens have a different kicker this year because last year's kicker, Billy Cundiff, is watching at home after shanking the potential game winning 32 yard field goal a year ago.  Ray Lewis is playing with house money after Joe Flacco pulled a Houdini and John Fox gift-wrapped another week for Lewis' Ravens.  Are the Ravens good enough to win this? Absolutely.  Is there any way the Hoodie and Brady blow another opportunity for a ring?  No freaking way.  Patriots 30, Ravens 27

PS: I need to mention how, as a Giants fan, this weekend's games are especially painful to watch.  Last year, the final four was almost identical, with the Falcons playing the role of the Giants this season.  The good thing is for San Francisco and New England, they won't have the Giants to get in their heads this time.  

PPS: I don't want to see a Harbaugh Bowl.  And who in their right mind wants to see a Falcons/Ravens Super Bowl?  Blah.